T.E. Griggs
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It's the donutiest day of the year

6/5/2015

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They're sweet, soft, scrumptious – usually circular, with a nice hole in the middle – and I could eat one every day.

I'll definitely eat one today, probably more than one, because it's National Donut Day.

I love donuts. How could I possibly not love donuts? They're fried dough! And coated with sweetness! Oh, yes, people, I most definitely love donuts and will consume more than one of them today.

Homer Simpson is probably the world's most famous donut consumer. Even if you've never watched the animated television show "The Simpsons," you've probably heard of Homer and his love of donuts.

Matt Groening, the Emmy-winning co-creator of "The Simpsons," truly understands the value of the donut in our society.

"Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?" Groening has been quoted as saying. Doh!  

Donuts, often spelled as "doughnuts," for the obvious reason, have been around much longer than Homer Simpson and I have been devouring them, but their origin is debatable. Let's just say that donuts are considered American in origin by most donut authorities, and by the mid-1800s, they looked pretty much like our delicious fried-dough creations of today.

Speaking of "looking like," as in resembling, not all donuts are hole-in-the-middle circles. Some are circular with no hole but, instead, filled with fruit jam or chocolate cream or vanilla custard or some other luscious filling. And most of those filled donuts are topped with frosting, icing, powdered sugar or granulated sugar. You already know that, of course, because almost everybody loves donuts and knows all about all of their different, delectable incarnations. So, of course, you know that besides round donuts, they can also look like a rather flat log, while  some varieties look long and twisted – you know, like braided. Yep, we donuts lovers know and love all varieties of fried dough.

I suppose I have to include cake donuts as part of this donut discussion, too, but I'll always choose to eat and enjoy the yeasty, puffy, doughy, sweet, fried kind of donuts, thank you. In fact, my favorite is the glazed donut. That heavenly donut is simple, sweet perfection.

We have different names for donuts, so that we don't have to say "donut" each time we talk about donuts. I talk about donuts a lot, and over the years, I have learned different terms to use in conveying my thoughts about those fried-dough incredible edibles. My favorite is "belly bomb," which I picked up when I was assigned to Marine Corps recruiting. In my office at 9th Marine Corps District, headquarters for Marine recruiting in the upper Midwest, I'd come in around 7:30 a.m., and about six feet from my desk was a table with a pot of fresh coffee and one of those pink-colored, bakery-shop boxes full of assorted belly bombs. I usually had no problem acquisitioning a glazed belly bomb, because plenty of my fellow Marines preferred to acquisition a jelly-filled belly bomb or, perhaps, a chocolate éclair-type belly bomb or, maybe, one of those maple-log belly bombs. And rarely did I eat only one belly bomb. Fortunately, every day at lunchtime, I'd knock out some sit-ups and pull-ups and then run three miles.

My second career was in newspaper journalism. To my delight, I found that a good newsroom always has a table for a pot of coffee and a box of donuts. At one of those newspapers, I learned that donuts are also known as "fat pills." Oh, I could eat some fat pills, but I was no longer exercising and running each day at lunchtime. Thus, after some months of scarfing down fat pills, I started to become fat Griggs. I just didn't have the will to turn down those delicious fat pills. Fortunately, I started running again, at least when I had the time and was not on deadline.

I work in neither a Marine Corps office nor a newspaper newsroom these days, so I no longer face the temptation of donuts or belly bombs or fat pills displayed right there before my hungry eyes. Yet, I do buy the occasional glazed donut, and I try to jog, although I don't pound the pavement or hit the trail as often as I should.

I should pound the pavement or hit the trail today. I should, because I'm going to eat several delicious belly bombs today, on this wonderful National Donut Day 2015.

Maybe I'll jog to the Krispy Kreme shop and walk back home. Nah. Too far. I'll drive there and make a gluten of myself. I'll run tomorrow. I promise.
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    T.E. Griggs is a writer, editor and photographer and a retired U.S. Marine.

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